Thursday, May 16, 2013

So when are you having a 3rd?

First you start dating. Then the questions begin:

When are you getting engaged?
Then you get engaged: When are you getting married?
Then you get married: When are you having a baby?
Then you have a baby: When are you having the next baby?
Then you have a 2nd baby: Are you having anymore? 

It seems to be the natural cycle of young adult life. Now that we've had Connor, I've had several people ask the inevitable, so are you going to have a 3rd? And for us, the answer is no.

This is a weird topic for me, but I thought I'd share because I know many people struggle with this decision. How many kids do we want? I remember talking about it before we got married and we always quickly said "2 or 3." It was such an abstract concept for us back then. We both came from families of two kids, in fact families with an older girl and a younger boy. So two seemed to be a comfortable number for us.

After being told that I shouldn't have any more kids after my Broken Heart Syndrome induced heart failure, I had my doubts about even having 2 kids. Thankfully, I had a completely health pregnancy. But I was high risk and I did have a c-section. Each c-section becomes higher and higher risk and I am getting older. We decided that putting my body through the physical and emotional stress of another pregnancy is not worth the risk.

We feel like our family is complete now with our girl and our boy. I think we get the best of both worlds. Would we feel the same way if we had gotten two girls or two boys? I have no idea. Probably. I can't imagine not having these two sweet babies (yes they are and will always be my babies) in my life.

I have to admit that I still have my moments. Those moments where I get sad just thinking that I will never get to have that experience of meeting my new baby for the first time or those sweet newborn cuddles. Then I remember how much fun it is to have kids that are more interactive. I will never miss the total lack of sleep that comes with a new baby. So two it is. They certainly keep me busy enough! 

How many kids do you want? What made you decide on that number? It's not an easy decision!


  1. It is a hard decision, but it sounds like you made the best one for your family! Good for you!

    We aren't sure if we are done yet, but we are very happy with the size of our family right now. I'm guessing we are probably done. :)

  2. Oh those questions! I try not to ask anyone else those questions. They can be so personal!

    We are getting the question, so are you going to have a third baby? Truthfully we don't know yet. We go back and forth my hubby and I.

    Country Bunkin Mama

  3. What I find weird is that you get the "when are you having more" response from people, while all that I have heard is "oh you got your girl and your boy so your family is PERFECT, how nice that you are done!" Just strange - since you guys are done and we aren't. How is it that people somehow automatically know which response will be more irritating?? :)



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